Monday, November 10, 2008
#6 Important Law
My law would bring back gladiator combat. It would let consenting prisoners battle each other and the winner gets to leave prison and is places on parole. I envision a pay-per-view sort of system. Each prisoner-battle is a melee of 20 prisoners. The winner (the last person alive) gets their almost-freedom. The PPV revenues would be used to cover the costs of the event and the surplus would be redirected back the prison system. This law is good because it reduces the problem of prison overcrowding, by eliminating up to 19 inmates per match. This law encourages criminals to not crime again; if you put your life on the line for something (freedom), you aren't going to squander it. This law also helps prisoners reintegrate into society. A major problem for the released is finding unemployment after release. If the fights were to become popular, the winners would become famous, they might earn endorsement deals. An endorsement deal would give them enough income to not have to commit crimes to subside. This law is made of the people (who aren't the democratic-"this interferes with criminals' rights-"America-haters ), by the people (who like kick-ass things), for the people (well, prisoners: not exactly people. Oh! And not-prisoners' potential entertainment).
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3 comments:
wow ok so i am already afraid of those killer prisoners that will be released. but i totally am with you on all of the other parts of the law. reducing prisoners in prisons is all good. what if you offer the winning prisoner a steak dinner and a play boy. that i think would be a fair trade to the guy prisoners. do you want to put this law in for the gurl pisoners too? because i may have to think of another crazy trade of for them.
at this point i wouldnt vote for that law as it is written right now.
This law would be lovely. Fighting for your life is a great way to show those criminals not to pull any stunts once out of prison if they live to see the day. Besides, it would make our country a much more badass place. Can I buy tickets to watch these matches? Or just sneak in? Maybe I'll be a criminal just so I can have the life changing experience of either dying or not dying, and therefore obey the law.
I hate this law! I wouldn't vote for it! You know why? Because it restricts my right . . . to kick ass! I want to be allowed to compete in these events! I have the right to die in epic gladiatorial fashion! I'm sure it’s in the constitution somewhere! As you say convicts arnt people so why should they get to fight and not me? And don't give me that animal rights bull shit! Cuz if I can’t hunt it (legally) it’s not an animal!
If this law were passed I would break it by leaping from the stands into the fray yelling "Git Er' Done!" That would show those filth convicts what’s waiting for them on the outside! Me! And I’ve gots me a 2x4! Yeeeeeeeeeeeehaw!
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